What goodbyes do you need to say so you won’t be living in pain? Make a commitment to say them today, and then take action as soon as you can on that commitment. Be kinder to someone, and to yourself, than someone may have been to you.
We’re smart. We’re educated. We’re successful. We’re attractive. We’re well read.
And none of that matters on some days. Some days even though you know you can’t control anything but your own responses, and you know you will get through this, and you know you could choose something else to do, crying is the only thing that seems to make sense. Or maybe it’s simply that crying is the only thing you really want to do.
Sometimes if feels hard to keep on going every single day, to put on your happy face, to stay strong, to keep putting one foot in front of the other, to stay in the game. You just need a little break. Maybe a little crying jag.
So, if that’s how you’re feeling, I say go for it.
Cry your eyes out, baby. And do it really well. Cry until your nose runs and your shirt is stained. Ruin that silk shirt. I always hated how careful I had to be when I was wearing it anyway. Cry until your eyes are so swollen you can barely open them. Wail a little, too. Go on, you know it feels good to wail.
And while you’re crying, rant a little. Work up a really good rant about how unfair it is. How awful he is. How pathetic you feel. How hopeless the situation feels. Let it out. Throw a toddler tantrum.
My favorite place to do this is the shower. I can stand under that steaming water and really work up a good wailing ranting sobbing pity party. And I can keep that going after the shower for a few hours, or even a few days if necessary. I do take breaks from the sobbing to just feel down and out, but the tears come back after break is over.
Thing is, I know when I’ve played it out. There really is nothing that this cry will accomplish but letting off some of the pent up frustration and pressure that I’ve built up inside of me. And that’s important! But, in the end, I still have to put on my big girl panties and wipe my eyes and blow my nose and comb my hair and go back to one foot in front of the other.
If I don’t remember that part, I need to reach out for some help, and so do you.
But honestly, sometimes it’s much easier to stay in the game after a mini vaca. And those don’t always have to be at the beach.